Something cool I found out!

Two things I found out, but one of them I can't speak of until she decides to tell the rest of the world. Meg. Hahahaha...I'll write about her little revelation later on :]

But the other is that my mother took a new job at this place called Maximus, apparently they handle Medicaid and other state programs...anyways, she said there was a guy at work with her that had a scar all the way up into the back of his head, down his neck, and pretty sure down into his back too. Well, curiosity got the best of her, and she asked him about it. (So nosey! lol)

He went on to tell her that he had what most people call a "humpback/hunchback"...which is technically called Kyphosis...and she told him about how I had scoliosis surgery, that I had it really bad, and that they totally fixed it...then started talking about how my surgeon had passed away back in August :[ And he said something like, "Dr. Shelokov??" (I wasn't there for this convo lol) and she said "Yes!"...he said that was HIS surgeon also!! He had the operation back in 1999-2001(?) Isn't that awesome? Dr. S's patients are just scattered all over the place. But he is the 4th in this area that I have heard about...I am sure there are more, but I haven't learned about them! Anyways, I just think its totally cool, and she told him about my blog, but since my Mom is kinda technically challenged (love you mom!!) she told him my blog was lifeiscrooked.com. Hahaha. Well, she came pretty close, so maybe he will find it if he looks for it. Adam, if you are reading this, then HELLO! And I would love to meet you!!

I am still doing totally awesome as far as pain...it just seems to get a little less every single day. As long as I don't act like SuperWoman and try and get 1,845,924 things done in one day. The annoying pain in my side is easing up too! Its so encouraging to me! The only issue I really deal with now is that pain on top of my fusion, feels like tension, not sure what it is, but its like a bad burning and tight sensation and it just SUCKS! And like I said before, my back where the actual fusion took place is not hurting at all, just tender from the surgery...and I was wondering the other night..."What if it doesn't hurt because uhhhhh its still NUMB??"...if my back 'wakes up' and stuff, and hurts, then what? But I am thinking it would have started hurting before now. And a lot of it before was pain AND the feeling like I was totally scrunched up. I don't know...I am just rambling now. [What the blogs for, right?? :)] So anyways, now I am all excited about the pain being gone, the side pain being gone, but now have this upper shoulder region pain. I have an appointment with my pain doctor in October, so I shall ask him about that.

I was already gonna tell him that I really only need pain meds on the days that I work because of all the bending over and stuff, the end of the 6 hours, I am hurting pretty bad. I am off the muscle relaxers and the Ambien...so maybe he can work out yet another regimen with me as far as medicating me! :]

Oh and I am also happy that I am almost done with my Bone Growth Stimulator...December 15th will be my very last day to wear that thing! One month prior to my one year anniversary!

Also, the weather changing and stuff, is taking me to this time last year. As I was getting closer to the surgery, and doing all the pre-op procedures to get ready for this, I don't know...it just kinda makes me sad and I don't know why. The people who know my whole story might understand what I am talking about...I was in a very bad marriage, on top of dealing with getting ready for this surgery, I went through HELL to get to January 15, 2009 and its like I am reliving it all in my mind. I have been having nightmares of having to have the surgery again, or weird stuff like that. My mom got my hospital pictures developed and when I looked at them, although I am happy I had the surgery, looking at the pictures makes me feel...I don't know the right word for it...melancholy?

I am coming close to the anniversary of when I had my first pre-op procedure done (in November)...a discogram, which was not fun, it was scary and I hated every minute of it. Just things like that. Am I weird for feeling like this?

Well...I gots to go...will write again soon!

8 months ago today...

I was lying in my hospital bed, barely 12 hours outta surgery...my hand faithfully clutching my Morphine pump...hahaha. I really, really can't believe its already been 8 months. I remember my friend Meg coming to my hotel room the night before my surgery, and I was thinking how awesome she looked and she was 9 months out from having her scoliosis surgery. And here I am, where she was, nearly!

I am happy to report that I am totally off of all the muscle relaxers and Ambien, and the only time I take prescription pain killers are the 2 days a week that I work. Other than that, I just take OTC Ibuprofen. Actually, today I worked and I took the Ibuprofen throughout the day, and I did ok. So its kinda a big deal to me to be off all the medicine. For so long, I was either in pain with no remedy, or taking pills with no relief. So to say now that I can get through a day with just 2 Ibuprofen is a very big deal to me.

The days that I work are just hard on me because of the constant bending over, and handling the kids. And really its the top of my back, like where my neckbone is that hurts, and its like the muscles are so tight and stressed and thats what hurts. My spinal area doesn't hurt nearly at all. Its either pain above or below the fusion, which I knew would take place. But the difference in this pain and the pain before, is that I can actually control this pain with medicine and maybe a heating pad and just a little rest. Before, NOTHING I did would take the hurting away. I could take 5 pain pills, lay on my heating pad alllllll day and still hurt like the dickens. (Wow, my grandma is the one who says 'hurts like the dickens', I must be getting old!)

My granddad, who is like totally the most important man to me, my Dad is more like it...he is in the hospital right now having had a knee replacement yesterday morning. I went to see him yesterday and tonight, and its so hard to see him like that. For all of my life, even up until the day before he went in to have this surgery, he has been an ACTIVE part of my life. Always doing something...and to see him laid up, and in pain, and can't move...it's really hard. He looks so frail and helpess, which doesn't fit his name, we call him Bigdad (not BigDaddy, he's not a pimp lol) He has had a rough time the last several years with his foot issues, his shoulder and his knees, and I just pray that this surgery will bring him some relief. I am thankful though that all the stuff wrong with him are mild to severe AILMENTS and not anything life threatening.

Well, I am off to bed...I am beat!! Adios.

Diapers are for babies!

I am soooo happy to report that my baby is now potty-trained! And practically overnight!

I kept trying to get her to potty, bought her some panties, got a potty chair, and a potty seat, and nothing would work! She'd watch "Potty With Elmo" over and over and nothing was sinking in. When I was gonna start working at Mothers Day Out, the director told me that she would move Lanie into the 3's (so she wouldn't be in my class) but she had to be potty-trained. Asked how I was coming along with that. And I just told her we were working on it. She told me that maybe once she see's the other kids using the restroom, she would be inspired! Well, some of the other kiddo's in my class were trotting to the potty a few times a day, and Lanie I guess saw them going on the itty-bitty toilet and she kept wanting to try. Lo and behold, she peed one day, and I jumped up and down, acting like an idiot, praising her...she was looking at me like I was a nutcase lol.

Its like as soon as she pottied and realized what she had done, with the help of her goofy mother, a light bulb went off over her head and she just GOT IT! Like, "Ohhh, so THAT'S what Mama's been talking about?!" Hahahaha. Every since then, she has told me when she needs to potty, even waking in the middle of the night to come and tell me, and she stays dry all the time! I just can't believe it. I gave the rest of my diapers to my cousin, and just bought some Pull-Ups for nighttime, and the rest of the time, she sports her little Elmo panties!

I am so glad not to have to buy diapers anymore, but then also, this means that all Lanie's babyness is gone. No more bottles, diapers, nothing. Of course, she'll always be my baby, but yeah...

Ok, well its 3:30 AM...I am going back to bed!